Category: Sex

Size is Important

Even so, there is a lot to be said for the cautious approach, especially if she is engrossed in one of her favourite TV programmes at the time. There is – I’ve found – nothing more disconcerting to the lady of the household than interrupting her when she is engrossed. Particularly if the aforementioned drama is getting to a good bit that could involve the removal of the protagonist’s shirt for some strenuous scything. It is best therefore to wait until the end of the programme, or an advertising break – depending on how urgent the need. If you are…

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Little Frigging All-Nude Mass Pogo Stick Display Team

The Little Frigging All-Nude Mass Pogo Stick display team are preparing themselves for an exhibition of pogo-stick based perversions at the UK Annual Rude And Naughty Exhibition at the O2 Arena, in London at the end of this month. As you probably know, if you indulge in a frequent perusal of my organ whenever I display my latest outpourings, quite often the Little Frigging naked pogo stick squad can be found exhibiting themselves to the public whenever the opportunity arises. They have displayed themselves to many thousands of people throughout the length, and – on two occasions – the breadth,…

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The Sensual Mathematician

It is usually not until after the age of puberty that we realise just how sexy the number 7 is. After that, it seems we become obsessed with mathematics and seeing numbers in all their naked glory. Back in the days before the internet how many of us used to lie under the bedcovers at night with a torch and a book of six figure logarithmic tables, despite the warnings from our elders and maths teachers that it could make us go blind. Then there were the dreams of simultaneous equations and vulgar fractions that made us wake hot, sweaty…

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A Dirty Mind

‘Don’t worry,’ I said. ‘I’ll think of something.’ ‘Oh.’ She shuffled her feet and gave me one of those looks. ‘What’s that mean?’ I said. ‘What’s what mean?’ ‘That look.’ ‘What look?’ ‘The sort of look a woman gives a man when she’s expecting him to make an arse of himself, or worse an arse of her.’ She was watching me carefully. I thought about naming her. I should have done it before I’d started writing her, so I could have begun with identifying her as a specific person. ‘A sensible one this time.’ ‘What?’ I was beginning to wonder…

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About The Weather

There are times when outdoor, or field, perversions become somewhat problematical. I am sure, by way of example, you are all too familiar with what can happen with weasel liver oil when diluted by water, which makes it unsuitable to use as a lubricant, or other unguent, during a downpour. If there is heavy rain in prospect during your field perversions then I would suggest you equip your perversion utility belt with badger spleen oil, rather than the more usual – for outdoor perversions, that is – weasel liver oil. It is also wise – and here I speak from…

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Charabanc Trip

Now then, it seems that some of you have not filled out and returned your application forms for this year’s annual weekend trip to the Naughtie Islands. As you know every year, we here at Little Frigging organise a charabanc trip to the Naughtie Islands for one of their Infamous Perversion Weekends at Castle Frottage, on the coast of Loch Munch on South Naughtie Island. There we can all take part in a full weekend of role-play games of fully-immersive perversions, and we don’t even have to provide the cream cakes, or even the ladle. Although, those of you who…

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The More Advanced Fruit-Based Sexual Perversions

We have mentioned fruit-based perversions before, but for those wishing to further their understanding of these more esoteric deviations today we are going to examine some of the more advanced fruit-based sexual perversions. Such deviations as the Loganberry Run and the Strawberry Feel are, quite evidently, more for the summer months. This is especially so in the case of the Loganberry Run where the loganberry bowler will need a long run up before bowling the loganberries. That is if the receiver is to get the full erotic benefit from the event. With the Strawberry Feel, of course, the long light…

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A Surfeit of the Middle Ages

Although born in the late Middle-Ages, Palfrey Surfeit became one of the most famous proto-scientists and artists of his – and all – time. Surfeit astounded the scholars of the period when he discovered that women were naked under their clothes. He also proved the moon was not actually made of the navel lint of angels as was commonly believed back then. The natural scientists of the time, following Aristotle, were aware that there were - in theory - such things as naked ladies. After all, they believed the first woman, Eve, was naked in the Garden of Eden. But…

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The Little Frigging Ladies Synchronised Fondling Display Team

Now, as it happens, the Little Frigging Ladies Synchronised fondling display team are already to give the annual Little Frigging mixed-doubles fondling demonstration that – as a tradition dating back to the week before the introduction of colour TV into the locality – is both ancient and noble. Now, those of you who have not had the pleasure of receiving a synchronised fondling from a team of experts can well imagine, it is not an experience for those not able to stand firm under such an onslaught. This is especially true when the highly dexterous fingers of the ladies are…

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How Computers Became Ubiquitous

Fumigate Sockdrawer became the world’s foremost computer scientists at an unusually young age. He developed one of the leading software programs that became essential for every computer in the home or workplace in the early years of the internet. Sockdrawer was also instrumental in the growth of the internet from a hobbyist pastime to the essential service it is these days. There have been many discussions of the early days of the computer revolution and its pioneers before. However, even the more comprehensive histories have sometimes overlooked the role of Sockdrawer in the story of the computer. As more or…

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